Break some Rules (OK only if it is safe)

Man Beat NFL Rules by Changing Last Name to “Ocho Cinco” http://www.yesbutnobutyes.com/archives/2008/09/they_call_me_oc.html

Wide receiver Chad Johnson of the Cincinnati Bengals wanted to put his nickname Ocho Cinco (his jersey number "eight five" in Spanish) on the back of his uniform, but strict NFL rules only allow for real surnames. So what did Chad do? He got his name legally changed to Chad Ocho Cinco! So the NFL now had no choice but to let him do it

I guess my title here doesn't make any sense since he didn't break any rules, he just worked around it... The old way is not always the right way.

Rules and norms are there to govern us. They help our society stay unified. Please note that I am not talking about law/government. It is strictly rules/norms that are imposed on society by society. In the NFL case the rule was the jersey name on the back worn by the players must match their last name. Imagine if there was no rule. Any one could have any name. People could use profane language, and that’s not good because children do watch NFL!

So there is a reason that rules exist... But that doesn't mean we can't work around them. Say you are given a sheet of paper with a rectangle box in the center. You are then asked to color the box with your favorite color (I would pick pink!!!!) and the rule was to color the box. Would you color inside the box or outside? I would color the entire paper with different pink shades... since the paper itself is a rectangle box (Creative huh!)

4 T's to a relationship

Recent trend is 'failed relationships.' Divorce rate is escalating. There is failure in parent-child relationship. Friendship is not the same as it used to be.

Here is my little wisdom on successfully maintaining a relationship. (My wisdom comes from merely observing my family's and other's relationship with each other) Let me call it Four T's for a great relationship.

1. Time
2. Talk
3. Touch
4. Treat

Time
----
* Each relationship requires time from both parties.
* It is important to take time out to spend with one another to maintain the relationship.

Talk
----
* Talk it out.
* You must have something in common to talk about to maintain the relationship
* Ask/Listen
* Talk about feelings (only if the other party is comfortable)
* Communicate, keep things simple
* Communicate even small issues. It's important to get the small things figured and solved immediately.

Touch
-----
* A pat in the back
* A hug
* Cuddle

Treat
-----
* Treat the other with praise
* Show your appreciation by your actions.
* Smile at them
* Example, treat them with a small ice-cream party just because you like them.

-DONE-

There are two faces to a penny

I have this friend. I can't really name her since she might read this, so let me call her Sophia.

Sophie seems sweet and caring. She is outgoing and entertaining. She has got it all. This is her face up.

She knows how to subtlety push people's button and seem innocent about it. She will make a small 'innocent' comment that is rude a hurtful and project innocence to herself.
My instincts tell me she is not innocent. When you confront her she covers by saying that she didn't mean it that way and that she is innocent in her words and that I should know her better. I guess I don’t. I love her hence I try to give her the benefit of the doubt, but my instincts tells me she is anything but.

You see Sophie is my long-term family friend. It used to bother me that she is this way. If she were a new acquaintance, I would dump her by now, but she is one of my family friends.

But now I have come to accept it and accept the fact that she will never change. Accept the fact that she will be around my life....Next time she brings out her other face, I will be ready and smart.

Stay Hungry | Stay Foolish

Word!

How crazy are you? (I mean in a good way)

They are many weird people in this world, but very few qualify as CRAZYYYYY. It's a real achievement! (Now, I don't mean insane crazy I mean fun crazy.) Do you take the weird opportunities or do you follow the 'normal' crowd.

What does Crazy mean?

Dictionary describes as....

1. Full of Cracks or flaws
2. Mad, insane
3. Being out of the ordinary
4. Distracted with desire or excitement

I am using crazy in the context of 1, 3, and 4 of definition above. To me crazy means anything that is not normal/norm/common. It means doing something different and something unexpected. Here is an example: Chenna Masala Curry! The recipe has been passed on to me from generations. I used to constantly make it in the certain way my mom taught me. One day I had a crazy idea and decided to experiment. My friends and family loved it. They want me to make it all the time now and want to know where I came up with the idea. My secret to the normal recipe is to add Italian sauce. Pretty Crazy huh… (You can try this with other dishes but not all of them will taste good.)

What does Normal mean anyway?

Dictionary describes as....

1. Conforming of a type, standard, or regular pattern
2. Occurring naturally
3. Of, relating to, or characterized by average intelligence or development.

Normal is just average. It's not below but it's not above either. If people expect you to be normal and you expect yourself to be normal you will never develop further and hence will not grow.

Here is an idea: In order to be better than average you have to implement craziness.
Caution: While implementing this idea, please keep in mind that there is a fine line between crazy and insanity.

Happy for Ever and Ever

What is happiness? How do we find it? Everyone seems to be looking for it, including myself. I have seen lot of people who spend all their money to gain it. Do we gain it through vacation trips, alcohol, shopping and other materialistic experiences? Who knows maybe that is the way to achieve happiness!

But the way I see it, when we engage in these things we loose control of our minds. Our mind is focused on temporary pleasure. It is an un-human behavior. Aren't human's supposed to be intellectual hence letting mind wander into temporary bliss lead to animal like behavior and hence making happiness temporary (since as humans, by default we need intellectual stimulus to sustain) This un-human behavior does not lead to a permanent state of happiness.

Is there a permanent state of happiness? Most religions say there is? There is a concept of Bakthi in Hinduism where one can reach internal bliss. Buddhism speaks of Mahayana (salvation.) Etc. Is religion the answer to happiness? To me religion is too complicated to understand or practice in a day to day life. So how do I find happiness when religion puts me in the state of confusion?

Here is a thought...

If you were at a party and the host wanted to introduce you to a guy who is always happy. He has never been through any tough situation. He had everything in life: money, education, perfect parents, looks etc. He had it easy. Would you be interested in meeting this person to learn more about him? What if the host wanted to introduce you to a guy who had to go through rough spots in life? He had to climb the ladder slowly with set backs constantly. Who would you be more interested to meet?

Maybe life is not about having happiness every second of your life. If we were happy always then we would be boring for ourselves let along others. Maybe subconsciously we choose to be unhappy since we won’t want to be boring to ourselves. If there were permanent blissful happiness then we would not grow hence an intellectual stimulus, we would be animals never wanting to change, just reacting to situation. So wouldn’t you say non-happy moments are necessary to grow (basic human need) and hence lead to happiness since a basic human need is met?

Patience is the Virtue

If I have any short coming it has to be my lack of patience. (Yes I am mostly perfect otherwise)

Patience. is not my virtue. If I start something today, it has to be done today, whether it’s reading a new book, or taking a course, a new project or weight loss. I want to see the results now. I am trying to change this.

Of course it would take some time to learn this new trait called patience. Waiting… How does one wait gracefully? I am starting to learn this just now. For all the people, I drove insane with my constant nagging from frustration due to lack of tolerance. SORRY!

So here is to everything I learned about Patience. recently. (Note: It’s in no particular order, and therefore might not make sense. If this frustrates you, have some patience to read through my chaotic notes)

Webster’s Definition of patience:
patience is the ability to endure waiting, delay, or provocation without becoming annoyed or upset, or to persevere calmly when faced with difficulties.

Lesson Learned: Next time I exhibit these traits (personalities) i.e. annoyance, upset-ness or any non-calm natures, remind me about patience.

“patience and Mulberry leaf become a silk gown” – Chinese Proverb.

Lesson Learned: It takes time and energy to complete tasks.



Lesson Learned: You have to wait for your prayers to be answered. (According to Hinduism, sometimes you will have to wait for life times.)

I read this some where but can’t remember where….
“Suicide is nothing but lack of patience. If only the person who committed suicide waited a bit longer to calm himself/herself down. If only they waited, their situation could get better”

Lesson Learned: Impatience (lack of patience) could kill!

If I have ever made any valuable discoveries, it has been owing more to patience attention, than to any other talent. – Issac Newton

Lesson Learned: To achieve greatness one needs to have patience.


So here is the summary of what I learned so far
1. Next time I exhibit these traits (personalities) i.e. annoyance, upset-ness or any non-calm natures, remind me about Patience
2. You have to wait for your prayers to be answered. (According to Hinduism, sometimes you will have to wait for life times.)
3. Impatience (lack of patience) could kill!
4. To achieve greatness one needs to have patience

I still haven’t learned how to gain patience yet.

I can’t pray for it. If I pray for it, it might be answered in another life time or I would be given the opportunity to learn patience in this life time only. This just means that God will give me opportunities that would require me to wait and require being tolerant.

I can’t practice it. In order to learn patience, I have to be patient in the mean time to achieve it. Well, I kind of want it now.

Since impatience leads to lack of calmness, the reverse technique might work. That is calmness leads to patience. May be I need to do some Yoga to calm myself down. But I have no patience to yoga, its boring.

What else can I do to learn patience? This is frustrating and annoying. I am exhibiting the traits of impatience! I just need to be patient until I learn some successful patience techniques.

Childhood Issues

Every one says childhood is the best time of their lives. All adults recall the innocence and laughter and fun they have had as children. They despice being adults and wish to go back to their childhood days.

Its not that way for Jess. You see Jess had a very controlled, orthodox upbringing. (For the sake fo this person, I will leave her name out as well as her 'childhood issue') Jess still carries around the baggage into adulthood. The hurt she felt as a kid and the isecurity of being controlled still haunt her.

According to me what Jess doesn't seem to realize is this:
Childhood is ignorance
Oldage is good byes
Adulthood is the time to live.

Adulthood is where you have control of your life. You can dictate where you want to go, what you want to do and how you want to feel about your life. I have known so many people including Jess who try to make up for what they missed in their childhood by trying to overcome or overshadow their insecurities in life. Their entire personality is being defined by their childhood experiences and by the way their parents raised them. They blame their parents for all their problems. "I could be ______, if only my parents taught me how to" They start and end their lives in a blame cycle. It is their parent's fault that they are doomed to this life (It's a pity party. I heard it's not as fun party as it seems. If you have attented some, you know what I mean. Please try to avoid them. To be honest even I have attened some.)

As adults we have a choice to either be stuck in the past or change our lives. We have a choice to clean out the deomans in the closet that come with childhood. We have a choice to ignore our parent's short commings and focus on now and on us. We can choose to be happy despite our childhood issues.

THINGS AREN'T ALWAYS AS THEY APPEAR!!!

A WOMAN was flying from Seattle to San Francisco .

Unexpectedly, the plane was diverted to Sacramento along the way! . The flight attendant explained that there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircraft the plane would re-board in 50 minutes.

Everybody got off the plane except one lady who was blind... The man had noticed her as he walked by and could tell the lady was blind because her Seeing Eye dog lay quietly underneath the seats in front of her throughout the entire flight.

He could also tell she had flown this very flight before because the pilot approached her, and calling her by name, said, "Kathy, we are in Sacramento for almost an hour. Would you like to get off and stretch your legs?" The blind lady replied, "No thanks, but maybe Buddy would like to stretch his legs."

Picture this:
All the people in the gate area came to a complete standstill when they looked up and saw the pilot walk off the plane with a Seeing Eye dog!

The pilot was even wearing sunglasses. People scattered. They not only tried to change planes, but they were trying to change airlines!

True story... Have a great day and remember...


THINGS AREN'T ALWAYS AS THEY APPEAR.

Walk in Love

Why do marriages end? Why does love end? Think about it. Let’s take General Version of love story:
“Tom found the right girl, Nicole. Nicole was perfect. She was pretty, smart and caring. Tom fell in love. They married for 10 years and have adopted 2 children. One day tom woke up and decided he didn’t love Nicole anymore or visa versa. I am not sure what happened between these two. According to general version of love, step 2 is broken; they were not in love anymore. So off to step three, try again with other people. In walks Katie. Katie and Tom are now married with one daughter. Let’s see how far this would last.”

As a single person with a prospect of marriage one day, I want to honestly admit that divorce scares me. It's just a word isn't it? But divorce to me means “end of a family.” This scares me because to me it is the absolute manifestation of failure in life (I guess that would mean the definition of my success involves happy marriage.)

What makes a marriage fail? I was brainstorming couple of things that might lead to failure of marriage: ego, miss-communication, lack of compromise, win-loose situation, lack of compassion, selfishness, miss trust. I think I can go on forever.

What makes a marriage work? Well I have been in the privilege of watching my parents, aunts and uncles, and some of my friends successfully work on their marriage. They compromise. I see them do small little things for each other daily to show each other that they care. The wife cooks the husband’s favorite food. The husband takes care of house hold chores. I see the compassion and friendship between a husband and wife. Most of all I see balanced compromise and mutual respect for one another.

This gives me hope for myself. Marriage might not be happily ever after, but it is walking in love for the rest of your life no mater what life throws at you. Well I just have to take this journey for myself one day…

Color me Pink!

I hated Pink
Pink was such a feminine color. I wouldn't be caught dead wearing it. Any shade of pink was unacceptable for me. Don't get me wrong, I was not a tom boy. I still wore dresses, makeup and hung out with my gal pals. It's just none of the above were in the shade of pink. I remember my dad bought this dress for me that had a light shade of pink on the blouse and I refused to wear it. (Trust me when I say that it created a big drama in my house)

I now love Pink
I don't know when the transition happened. But as I was looking in the closet this morning, I realized that a good bulk of my cloths now contain a shade of pink color in them. What has happened to me? My cell phone color is pink! My watch's dial is also a pink color now. I have a shade of pink lipstick, pink nail polish. OMG I have been pinkified!!!!

What has happened to me? I have turned from a pink-day-in-hell personality to a pink-day-every-day personality!

Here is my analysis on this: I used to hate pink because it represented feminine color. To me it represented a Barbie doll, a softness persona, a weak persona who is dependent on someone else. I might have come to this conclusion due to the environment around me. At that time, people around me treated me as a child. They treated me as someone who was not independent, someone who cannot make decisions for herself, someone who is soft and could not speak up for herself. My culture also projects this. Hence, I had falsely manifested to myself that these assumptions people made of me were due to my feminine characters. Since pink represented femaleness, I hated pink.

Somewhere along the way this changed for me. I realized that being female has its own positive attributes. I learned to break away from the stereotype regarding woman’s attributes that came from my surroundings. Now, Female characteristics to me include strength, kindness and compassion which are now enduring to me. As I grew up I became a self-sufficient, independent individual. I did not require other's guidance to make decisions. As I started to realize this, people around me changed. They started treating me like an adult. Somewhere along the way I started embracing my female characteristics (not in a feminist way). I am proud to be a woman and hence have embraced pink color as a sign of strength in a woman and not a sign of weakness.

I am now a proud PINK fan!

What’s your Poker Personality?

I had a poker party at my place last Saturday with 4 other girls. Put in 5 girls into a game of gambling and you can reckon they will be an interesting set of personalities. Note: We did not gamble, it was just in the name of fun, with fake chips.

Before I get into my analysis of these girl's personalities, I just want to let you know that the names are made up. If you girls are reading this and you realize who you are, reveal yourself with caution.

Here is my analysis. It is divided into three sections, pre-game, game and analysis. Pre-game consists of my perception of her personality before the game, game consists of my perception of her personality during the game, and analysis, well, consists of analysis of both perceptions

Girl No 1 (Babe):
Pre-game: Babe is intelligent, confident, and is an observer. She likes to process things and make decisions. She needs to know the facts and needs to analyze the facts before making the decisions.
Game: Babe was cautious. She didn't take many changes. She could not manipulate or bluff her way into winning.
Analysis: Babe couldn't bring herself to bluff; she would only play if she knew she had a good hand. Manipulation, you can forget it. The word didn’t exist in her dictionary. Babe needs to step out of her box and take some risks.

Girl No 2 (Love):
Pre-game: Love is an extravert. She thrives on action. Love loves competition. She wants to be the winner. There is no room for failure in her dictionary. She has to be better than anyone else
Game: Love was impressive. She fought hard. She took some risks there for the purpose of winning.
Analysis: Love has a Poker Personality, the almost bluffer. You could tell Love had a good hand, it’s in her face. Love needs to also become an observer if she wants to win the game.

Girl No 3 (Truth):
Pre-game: Truth is friendly, obsessive, and a curious person. She, like babe, needs to process things to make decisions
Game: Truth couldn't keep it to herself. (You must have guessed it by the name I have chosen for her) She announced that she had a good/bad game just as the cards were dealt. By the end of the game she took some chances but with uneasiness
Analysis: I am proud of Truth. She fought very hard to break out of her true personality and form a poker personality. Truth still needs to learn not to feel guilty about taking chances.

Girl No 4 (Sweetie):
Pre-game: Sweetie is emotional, friendly and loves company. She is a people's person. She thinks through her emotions.
Game: Sweetie learned the game quickly; she learned to take some risks and had fun with different strategies of manipulations to win the game. She had a good poker face
Analysis: Sweetie was the most surprising. I did not expect her to take risks. She won quiet a few games. She enjoyed herself. Sweetie completely changed her personality to fit the poker game. She should be called the chameleon.

Girl No 5 (ME):
Pre-game: Perfection
Game: Poker-Perfection
Analysis: I am so damn perfect!!!!
-Sorry didn’t feel like analyzing me...

Is personality constant that in any situation who you are will stay the same? Do you have control to change your personality from situation to situation, group to group and time to time? Can't personalities change like a chameleon changes its colors? I think we can and we should. I would be bored with myself if I am the same in no matter what situation. I think we need to constantly reinvent ourselves depending on our surroundings.

Warning: Gambling could be injurious to your financial health and should not be taken lightly. Play poker in the name of fun and not in the name of gambling. Peace.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Summary of Stephen R. Covey's The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

The first three habits are:
1. Be Proactive
2. Begin with the End in Mind
3. Put First Things First

Habits 4-6 address interdependence:

4. Think Win/Win
5. Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
6. Synergize

The 7th Habit ...
7. Sharpen the Saw


- Take time out from production through renewal of the physical, mental, social/emotional, and spiritual dimensions. (Maintain a balance!)

Personal Effectiveness - YeY!

Change your definition of JoY

This is a story about a lady. I will choose to not reveal her identity, let me call her Jenny. Jenny had a tough life. Her father died young. She had a controlling mother. She was married before she could even think about thinking of her life. Now she has a controlling husband. After that responsibilities took over, taking care of her husband, children, and in-laws took priority. She always sacrificed her wants and dreams to put her family's first.

You see, she is a splendid heart. She is beautiful inside and out. No matter what life throws at her (which it does often - She should have a million of bumper stickers on the back of her car that says "shit happens") she has a smile for everyone. She has this nature towards her that drives people to her. She has got the perfect personality.


But inside she suffers. She craves for stability in her unstable world (lot of bumper stickers I tell you). She craves for peace of mind. She needs space from all the people around her. Don't even get her started about her physical health problems. If only she could run away for couple of days to find sometime for herself, to heal physically and mostly mentally. If only she could.

Don't get me wrong, Jenny is a positive person. All of us could learn a few things from her. It’s just that people around her drive her crazy with negative words. She only craves for simple things. She wants a nice little home to call her own with her family. She wants to own a piece of land or property that will make her future or her children's future a little bit more certain. But her circumstances are not cooperating.

What can she do when life doesn't cooperate? What can she do to achieve joy from life when it seems unreachable? What can she do to stop people from throwing daggers at her? She needs them in her life, one can't break a relationship. She thinks, relationships no matter how dysfunctional should always be in her life. Relationships are important for her.

How about redefining the terms of joy? Maybe she can think about redefining the definition of joy. You know the saying... "Don't put your happiness on something, what if you never get it." For example, saying that I will be happy when I loose 30 pounds. What if it takes you 10 years to loose it or you never loose it! In both cases you won't have happiness until you achieve it, either 10 years or never. So why base your happiness on one thing. Happiness should never be after something or someone.
Jenny needs to redefine her joy. It’s not about getting it after the stability from life that she seems to need. It's not about getting it after the physical healing or mental healing she craves. It’s not about getting it from her husband or children. It's not about getting it after the daggers (thrown by people around her) stop. It's about finding it now within herself. (It's important to develop inner personality. It's important to change how you talk to yourself.) It's about telling yourself how to find joy on your own? It's about joy in playing (look at post Do YOU Play?), cooking for family, reading a nice book and whatever gives her enjoyment today! (Pss… for all the people who are thinking: is she saying "I don't have to think about tomorrow... can do whatever I want today", remember there is a difference between pleasure and enjoyment. Pleasure might have negative consequences, enjoyment almost always doesn't)

Do you think with your emotions or do you think with logic?

Our (Me and my roommate) lease was up in May 31st and we needed to submit a termination of lease letter 60 days ahead. So we figured April 1st is the 60th day and went into the rental office yesterday (April 1st) to turn in our Termination of Lease letter. The ladies in the office would not accept our termination letter since the lease also implied "2 full months before" and they kept saying that we should have submitted the termination letter on March 31st rather than April 1st. No matter how many ways we argued (most important point - 60 days is in the contract) they wouldn't budge and kept repeating that it was not their policy and they couldn't do anything about it.

This entire experience made me wonder why some people follow the 'book,' word to word. They follow rules and principles and never consider other people’s situation. If I were in their position I would have accepted the ambiguity of the lease and let the tenants go off the hook. After all it is just a day's difference. It’s not as if I and my roommate went in 5 days later (not even 2 days) to terminate the lease.

So what does my experience have to do with Build Personality Blog? Well Thinking vs. Feeling is one of the debatable topics in psychology personality studies. In my story I and my roommate are the feelers while the landlord ladies were the Thinkers.

ChangingMinds.org has a small description of people who are Thinkers verses people who are Feelers

They describe each personality type as follows:

Thinking
1. Thinkers decide based primarily on logic, and when they do so, they consider a decision to be made. They tend to see the world in black and white and dislike fuzziness.
2. Perhaps because people are so variable, they focus on tangible things, seeking truth and use of clear rules.
3. At work, they are task-oriented, seek to create clear value. Interacting with them tends to brief and business-like.
4. They may be seen as cold and heartless by Feelers.

Feeling
1. Feelers decide based primarily through social considerations, listening to their heart and considering the feelings of others.
2. They see life as a human existence and material things as being subservient to this. They value harmony and use tact in their interactions with others.
3. At work, they are sociable and people-oriented and make many decisions based on values (more than value).
4. They may be seen as unreliable and emotional by Thinkers.

I am a Feeler. (Look at Post "What Personality are you? ".) I feel that mistakes and misinterpretations happen (not that we made a mistake in my case) and every individual should be given a fair chance to rectify. However the Thinkers (my landlords) feel that they should follow the book and not bend the rules even for a minor violation. But after reading the Thinkers vs. Feeler's article above I understand my landlords better (well not really, since I got screwed.) I understand that they need to make decisions based on logic and rules since that’s their personality. Also, a little voice in my brain just won’t stop saying they are out for my money! Hummm

Do YOU Play?

Why do children play? Children use play as a way to relieve their stress and take some time out from chores or academics. It is an essential in keeping the child happy and healthy (physically and emotionally.) It is there learning tool. It is important for parents and caregivers to provide opportunities for children to play.

Association of Childhood Education International has recently published a paper: "Play: Essential for all Children" The article contains the following statement:

"Children are growing up in a rapidly changing world characterized by dramatic shifts in what all children are expected to know and be able to do. Higher and tougher standards of learning for all populations of students are focusing on a narrow view of learning. Consequently, students have less time and opportunity to play than did children of previous generations. Few would disagree that the primary goal of education is student learning and that all educators, families, and policymakers bear the responsibility of making learning accessible to all children. Decades of research has documented that play has a crucial role in the optimal growth, learning, and development of children from infancy through adolescence. Yet, this need is being challenged, and so children's right to play must be defended by all adults, especially educators and parents. The time has come to advocate strongly in support of play for all children."

The entire article can be accessed here: http://www.acei.org/playpaper.htm

If you are convinced that children need to play then read further otherwise go back and read the article above.

Here is a thought I was thinking about the other day. Why don't some adults play... Isn't playing necessary for adults to relieve their stress and help them take some time out from chores and work.

I believe that play is essential for keeping 'everyone' happy and healthy (physically and emotionally.) We are forced to grow up in this rapidly changing world and we set higher expectations for ourselves. We wake up every morning and run around the world trying to achieve something and we forget ourselves. Why do we not take care of ourselves? I believe that most adults suffer from depression, anxiety and stress because we have forgotten to play.

So lets be kids again. Pick up a mystery book to read instead of Fortune Magazine once in a while. Paint. Dance. Sing. Play a computer game online. Buy yourself a Wii (I did and its tons of fun.) Host a games night at your place instead of a boring dinner party where people gather to talk about politics or cooking. Play a sport. Your brain needs a stress buster and play is the way to go (according to me anyway.)

So here is my summary: Let me know if you agree with me or not. Play leads to happiness and happiness leads to satisfaction and self satisfaction leads to confidence and confidence leads back to happiness. So the way to start the cycle going is to start playing. Become a child again.

"Growing old is inevitable, growing up is optional (Preach it!)"

A thought a day keeps the doctor away.

We all know the famous quote: "An apple a day, keeps the doctor away"
Hummm, What if I say "A thought a day keeps the doctor away." Well let me rephrase that, not just a thought, but "A positive thought a day keeps the doctor away"

I believe in the power of positive thinking. The following story illustrates my point:

I applied for a new job as a student at University of Waterloo, but since I had no previous job experience, my self-esteem was low. I considered myself to be incompetent. I was sure that I was not going to get the job. I had a negative attitude towards myself, and believed that the other applicants were better and more qualified than me. I manifested this attitude since I had no past experience in being interviewed or working even.

MY mind was filled with negative thoughts and fears concerning the job for the whole week before the job interview. I was sure I would be rejected. On the day of the interview I tried to be calm and prepared but there was this voice inside my head that just wouldn't stop being so well negative.

During the interview I was tense, displayed a negative attitude, worried about my posture, appearance, and felt hungry because I did not have enough time to eat breakfast. All this distracted my mind and made it difficult for me to focus on the interview. My overall behavior made a bad impression, and consequently I materialized my fear and did not get the job.

For my recent job interview, I had decided to follow a different strategy - Positive Thinking (It took a while to get here...) I applied for a job recently, but approached the matter in a different way. I was sure that I was going to get the job. During the week preceding the interview I often visualized me making a good impression and getting the job. I made sure I told myself that even if I don't land the job that doesn't mean that I am not worthy. I separated my confidence from my performance in the job interview. Behold I got the job because I made a good impression.


“Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.”

“A man is but the product of his thoughts what he thinks, he becomes.” - Mahatma Gandhi

I now totally believe and accept positive thinking is the way to life. From personal experience I am glad I joined the ‘cult.’ What about you are you interested in joining...

What Personality are you?

Are you an obsessive? Are you shy? Are you emotional? Do you react to feelings or think things through before you react?

The question here is who are you? What type are you? How do you see the world? How do you react to the world?

Take the Myers Briggs test sometime (http://www.kisa.ca/personality/)... Find out your personality type.

I am an ENFJ (Extroverted Intuitive Feeling Judging)

Myers Briggs describes my personality as "enthusiastic and energetic, involved with the people and events around them. Take interest in others and are easy to relate to. Expressive, communicate freely and openly, convincing and self-revealing. Reliable, responsible and persistent. Comes to quick conclusions and sometime as deciding too quickly before considering sufficient options"

When I first read mine, I was blown away. Hey that’s me dead on. I behave that way absolutely. (But there are times when I don't behave that way...I could be shy, depressed and anti-social at times!) Its still fun to figure out our ‘default’ personality (according to Myers Briggs anyway)

What do you think guys? Am I what Myers Briggs says I am, could I be different? What about you? Here’s another question… Which famous person has your personality type? Mine is Oprah Winfrey, Michael Jordan, Johnny Depp, and Abraham Lincoln. Awesome!!!

What is Personality?

What is Personality?

Webster Dictionary describes Personality as follows:

"The totality of qualities and traits, as of character or behavior, that are peculiar to a specific person."

To me personality is how we feel, how we act and behave. This is not just limited to how we react around people but also inner self.

Almost everyday we describe and assess the personalities of the people around us. Whether we realize it or not, we involve ourselves in these daily musings on how and why people behave. We ourselves have personalities that we project to the world. Our personality describes us, how we react to the world, how we see the world. It is our basis for emotion, reactions and action.

Then why is that we never consciously try to improve/change our personality. Is it really changeable? Are we just stuck with the "God's given" or "universe given" personality. If it is changeable, why do we let our personality development take a back seat? I see people worry and act to take care of their family, body, finances, career and living style. Rarely do I see individuals focusing on developing their confidence, self motivation and personality development.

Don't you think we oath to make a conscious effort to develop our personality on a daily basis?