Every one says childhood is the best time of their lives. All adults recall the innocence and laughter and fun they have had as children. They despice being adults and wish to go back to their childhood days.
Its not that way for Jess. You see Jess had a very controlled, orthodox upbringing. (For the sake fo this person, I will leave her name out as well as her 'childhood issue') Jess still carries around the baggage into adulthood. The hurt she felt as a kid and the isecurity of being controlled still haunt her.
According to me what Jess doesn't seem to realize is this:
Childhood is ignorance
Oldage is good byes
Adulthood is the time to live.
Adulthood is where you have control of your life. You can dictate where you want to go, what you want to do and how you want to feel about your life. I have known so many people including Jess who try to make up for what they missed in their childhood by trying to overcome or overshadow their insecurities in life. Their entire personality is being defined by their childhood experiences and by the way their parents raised them. They blame their parents for all their problems. "I could be ______, if only my parents taught me how to" They start and end their lives in a blame cycle. It is their parent's fault that they are doomed to this life (It's a pity party. I heard it's not as fun party as it seems. If you have attented some, you know what I mean. Please try to avoid them. To be honest even I have attened some.)
As adults we have a choice to either be stuck in the past or change our lives. We have a choice to clean out the deomans in the closet that come with childhood. We have a choice to ignore our parent's short commings and focus on now and on us. We can choose to be happy despite our childhood issues.
4 comments:
well explained.
But do you also agree that we should give our elder ones the credit for both positive and negative perspective..because if things were perfect they could be gods?
So, my take on the subject is:
Adulthood is when we realize that our parents were/are also humans who managed so many responsibilities at very young age, and that too in a world that was not so "full of opportunities"...
So, you are right..those pity parties are run by people who are still living their childhoods in their adult body.They still have not realized that parents can have their limitations and constraints that forced them to behave or come across in a certain way..
This subject is so vast and touchy ..but I admire your ability that you could think through it and could get it in one -two paras...
keep writing.
To me adulthood is not just when we realize our parents are just humans... but when we realize that we are in control of our thoughts, actions and emotions not our parents or our experiences
Yes..I agree.
It really depends on the kind of experiences and also the backgrounds.
And, yes, adulthood is definitely the phase when 'we' realize that we can control our thoughts and actions. But hey"conditions apply":-)lol..we still cannot avoid the external environment and its impact on your thoughts and actions ..some of us are strong enough to swim against the tide but not all..some people who had bad or not so fortunate childhoods take a long long time to overcome their fears but eventually they do with help and determination.
My comment was basically targeted towards the pity parties and people who "love" blaming their shortcomings on their parents.I strongly agree that it is better to avoid such gatherings.
Hey,
Just wanted to clarify that i am talking only about people who had unfortunate childhood. I am just talking about those adults who put the blame on past experiences and never take responsibilites for themselves.
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